There are many men having no difficulty achieving orgasm with vaginal intercourse or solo sex who cannot always climax when receiving a blowjob. Here are some tried and true ways in which that can be remedied.

The Brain: Your Other Sex Organ

Without question, your brain is the most significant and most potent sex organ in your body. Sex wouldn’t be possible without it. What you think and believe, how you feel and what you do are all controlled by the brain (and the central nervous system). When you use it to your advantage, your mind can bring you the ultimate in sexual pleasure. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true. Your mind can also cause great sexual dissatisfaction and difficulties.

For a man unable to orgasm from fellatio, he would do well to spend some time examining what is going on with the head between his ears before addressing the head between his legs.

Examine outdated or conflicting beliefs. What do you really think about blowjobs? Do you believe they are a perfectly natural form of sexual expression or do you believe that this particular sexual act is unhygienic, degrading, immoral or sinful despite how good it feels? Do you believe that ejaculating this way will relinquish your masculine power?

Examine your fears. What, if any, fears do you have about fellatio? Do you fear surrendering to a woman? Do you fear she doesn’t like the size or look of your manly rod? Do you fear she is not enjoying herself or won’t like how you taste? Do you fear losing your erection? Do you fear she may accidentally injure you? Are you afraid to tell your partner what to do? Do you worry that you won’t last long enough or too long? Are you afraid to disappoint your lover? Do you fear intimacy created by oral sex?

Examine your expectations. Do you have high expectations for yourself, your body or about blowjobs specifically that may be contributing to performance anxiety? Have you unknowingly accustomed yourself to ejaculate only under certain conditions (alone, vaginally, manually, while watching porn)? Do you believe that a blowjob must end in orgasm and ejaculation to be considered a “success”? Do you think an inability to climax from fellatio makes you less of a man or an incompetent lover? How positive is your sexual self-image?

Any limiting beliefs, fears or unrealistic expectations that can impact your sex life exists within your mind, not outside of your body. If left unexamined and unresolved, these negative thoughts about oral sex will continue to generate feelings of guilt, shame, fear or inadequacy. These, in turn, will create further stress and anxiety making the possibility of achieving orgasm from fellatio nominal at best.

Alcohol and Other Drugs

Alcohol, prescription and non-prescription drugs and other stimulants can negatively impact your brain (and central nervous system) and since your brain affects your sexual functioning, they will negatively impact your ability to ejaculate as well. Use caution.

The Penis: Your Favorite Sex Organ

Now that you have addressed your one head, it is time to move on to your other one. If you were successful in uncovering and resolving your “brain” issues; you should be feeling much more confident and relaxed. You should also be much more adept at focusing on the physical sensations of a blowjob without succumbing to all the negative mind chatter. Perfect.

One of the biggest challenges with fellatio is that the stimulation, while sublime, is not the same as vaginal intercourse or a handjob. For many men, the oral caresses of an attentive lover are simply not enough to trigger an orgasm. Here are some suggestions:

If you engage in regular masturbation, work on varying your solo stimulation techniques. By alternating the manual speed, grip, pressure and technique you will prevent over-sensitivity and make it easier to ejaculate during oral.

Allow yourself to let go. Some men purposely hold back from ejaculating during oral sex in order to prolong the pleasurable sensations. The problem, however, is that by holding back too long their penis then becomes desensitized and they cannot come at all.  Lasting longer may be wonderful for penetrative sex but it is seldom needed for oral sex. Besides, your partner will likely suffer from a sore mouth and jaw if you don’t allow yourself to let go in a timely manner.

Communicate your wants and needs. A woman does not have a penis so she will require you to let her know precisely how to worship yours. She will need to know what you enjoy (and what you don’t) during oral. You can indicate your desires with words, sounds or by gently guiding her head and hands.

Change your position. Some men report that laying horizontal on their back for an extended period will not only prohibit them from ejaculating during fellatio; they will also lose their erection. Not surprising since gravity will cause the blood within the penis to reverse its flow. These men did admit however that by simply changing to a sitting, kneeling or standing position during oral the problem was remedied more often than not. The added bonus is that these positions are usually far more comfortable for your partner as well.

Try a combination technique. A combination of oral attention to the head of the penis plus vigorous stroking of the shaft by her hand or yours is often sufficient enough to trigger ejaculation. Some men find the combination of light, feathery lip and tongue action with tight-grip stroking to be ideal to bring them to orgasm. For different sensations, consider having your partner stroke your shaft while wearing a glove on her hand. Try using gloves made of different fabrics such as silk, wool, leather or fur to decide which feels best. Be sure to have lubricant handy as well. Relax! Enjoy!




Variety Is The Spice Of Life!

One of the most frequent sexual complaints of married and long-term couples is https://homemods.org/usc/topics-for-argumentative-essays-for-high-school/46/ enter https://dsaj.org/buyingmg/does-blue-care-network-cover-viagra/200/ https://plastic-pollution.org/trialrx/paxil-cr-in-generic/31/ https://heystamford.com/writing/reviews-for-essay-writing-services/8/ many milligrams cialis daily de que esta hecho viagra is using easybib plagiarism go here is doxycycline good for bronchitis https://teamwomenmn.org/formatting/ringling-college-of-art-and-design-essay/23/ see url write me a essay cv writing services johannesburg difference between 50 and 100 viagra homework help for essays porphyrias lover robert browning essay best definition essay editor services ca she dwelt among untrodden ways william wordsworth essay best phd essay ghostwriter website us custom resume ghostwriter for hire online proper format for a college essay go to site source url viagra kvinnor http://hyperbaricnurses.org/3567-online-prescription-ultram-viagra/ https://tetratherapeutics.com/treatmentrx/nolvadex-during-cycle-gainsay/34/ public health research papers ventolin hfa 90 mcg per actuation buy best critical essay on hillary clinton creative writing course sa what are the basic elements of an essay boredom. Routine, predictable sex often occurs because couples stop their sexual exploration and experimentation. Many also lose their sense of adventure and humour when it comes to sexual play –  especially when the sex gets a little tricky –preferring to stick with the tried and true. Adding variety to your sex life need not be complicated or scary; just consider it a really fun way to try different types of sexual stimulation to help spark a diminishing libido. And remember that sex is much-needed adult play time so approach it with an air of curiosity, excitement and joy.

Ready to add some variety to your sex life but not sure where to start?  I have made up a list of 75 things people can do sexually with their partner. Consider this more of a “Spicy Activities List” encouraging you to try various items more than once in order to get their full benefit instead of a “Bucket List” with its try-once-and-move-on approach.

You can print off two copies of this list and give one to your partner. Each of you can then spend some time privately to complete your list and then compare your responses with each other. It is a great way to talk about the things you each want to try as well as where your interests differ. Open honesty and an absence of judgment will go a long way in this exercise.

You could also turn this exercise into a game by printing off this list and placing it in your partner’s lunch bag or sending it to them via phone or computer making them guess which activities are a “Yes” for you. It is also a great way to arouse and titillate your partner.


As you read through the list, simply mark each item as either a “Yes”, “No” or “Maybe” (Activities are listed in alphabetical order.)

  1. Anal Sex
  2. Anal Play
  3. Attend a Sex Party
  4. Bath Together
  5. Bondage
  6. Blindfolded Sex
  7. Breast Play
  8. Costumes
  9. Cyber Sex
  10. Delaying Gratification
  11. Dirty Sex Talk
  12. Domination & Submission
  13. Dry Humping
  14. Erotic Massage
  15. Erotic Food Play
  16. Erotica – Watching
  17. Erotica – Reading
  18. Erotica – Writing
  19. Exhibitionism
  20. Fantasy Play
  21. Fun with Fetishes
  22. Going Comando
  23. Go Parking
  24. Go Skinny Dipping
  25. Go to a Strip Club – As a Couple
  26. Go to a Sex Club – As a Couple
  27. Group Sex/Swinger’s Club
  28. Hair Pulling/Tugging
  29. Have Loud Sex/Have Quiet Sex
  30. Have Sex Three Times in One Day
  31. Have Sex Every Day for One Month
  32. Kissing
  33. Kitchen Sex
  34. Lap Dance – Give
  35. Lap Dance – Receive
  36. Licking Various Body Parts
  37. Lingerie Shopping – As a Couple
  38. Make Out Session – No Intercourse for at Least an Hour
  39. Masturbation – Solo
  40. Masturbation – Mutual
  41. Middle Of The Night Sex
  42. New Sex Locations
  43. New Sex Positions
  44. Office Sex
  45. Oral Sex
  46. Orgasm At The Same Time
  47. Outdoor Sex
  48. Phone Sex
  49. Playful Restraint
  50. Play Sex Games
  51. Pornography – Watching
  52. Pornography – Making your Own
  53. Pose Naked for the Camera
  54. Quickies
  55. Role-Play
  56. Rough Sex
  57. Sensual Biting/Nibbling
  58. Sexting
  59. Sex Against A Wall
  60. Shaving Each Other’s Genitals
  61. Shop at a Sex Shop – Alone
  62. Shop At A Sex Shop – As A Couple
  63. Shower Sex
  64. Skip Work to Have Sex
  65. Slow, Sensual Sex
  66. SM (Erotic Pain Play)
  67. Spanking
  68. Strip Tease
  69. Tantric Sex
  70. Thirty Minutes or More of Foreplay
  71. Threesome
  72. Trigger A Non Genital Orgasm (trust me it can happen)
  73. Use Sex Toys – On Self
  74. Use Sex Toys – On Partner
  75. Voyeurism
  76. If You Have Other Ideas Please Let Me Know

As you consider ways to add variety to your sex life, keep in mind that you’ll achieve greater success and confidence through a series of small changes rather than jumping right into radical sex. Take your time, experiment, explore and most of all…enjoy the journey! Have fun!




Share Licks, Flicks and Tricks With Your Wife!

Bursting with sexual potency, the male penis is such a wondrous organ of beauty and sensual pleasure that it can literally bring a lover to their knees.  And while every man proudly possesses one, its many variances in shape, colour, curvature, size and sensitivities make each penis as unique as the man to whom it belongs.

A man’s love shaft is also quite a complex and dynamic instrument with its erogenous areas often changing over time. This means that even the most astute penis worshiper will need to occasionally add new oral techniques to her sexual repertoire in order to provide her partner and his beloved organ with maximum pleasure.


Your warm, wet mouth has many ways in which it can generate pleasurable sensations for your partner so be creative when using your tongue, lips and yes even your teeth on his virile rod. With the various tips and techniques provided below, be enthusiastic. Be inquisitive. Be willing to communicate with him to determine what feels good and what doesn’t. Allow satisfying your man orally to be a sexual experience that is inherently pleasurable for you as well.

1. To build anticipation, begin by licking his shaft before he is completely undressed. Kneel down before him and blow warm air against him, right through his boxers or briefs. Wet the fabric with your tongue and glide it up and down his penis until his erection begs to be released from its confines.

2. Try placing his penis in your mouth while it is still flaccid. Begin gently sucking and licking until he hardens and swells to the point where he no longer fits. As you wrap your lips around his shaft and start pulling him out, with your lips over your teeth,clamp down gently and oh so slowly on the head of his shaft until you feel him shudder in pleasure. Release quickly and then take him into your mouth and continue with your oral ministrations.

3. While his penis is still soft, begin lightly licking the head with a flattened tongue – like you were licking a luscious ice cream cone. As he begins to stiffen, gently suck him into your mouth using only your lips. While holding his length inside your mouth, swallow. The unexpected wave of pressure on the tip will send him to the moon.

4. Have your man stand or kneel before you when you pleasure him orally. His upright position allows gravity to increase blood flow to his genital area thus creating a delicious pressure in his love muscle as well as intensity in sensations. Be sure to caress his inner thighs, buttocks and abdomen as you suck, lick and lap passionately.

5. The male genitals are equipped with perineal, scrotal and penile seam-like lines of skin located in the center of each of these areas – which provides an easy roadmap for your tongue to follow that will tease and delight his entire package all at once. Depending on the type of sensations you wish to impart on your lover, you can use either a pointed or flat tongue for this tantalizing technique. Begin at his perineum and in one slow lick travel up along the midline of his scrotum continuing up the center line of his shaft. When you arrive at the head, use your tongue to swirl, flick and lap it before placing it briefly into your mouth. Then begin the entire pleasure voyage again; as many times as needed.

6. Consider gently pinching the loose skin at the base of his virile rod as it causes the rest of the skin of his penis to be pulled taut, especially if your partner is uncircumcised. Hold it there while you slowly and sensually lick up and down his organ or you can simply lap at the base of his penis until he shudders.

7. Remember to also include the underside of his love rocket during oral pleasuring to stimulate his highly sensitive frenulum and the inner spongy area that fills with blood during an erection. For this technique, press his penis upward against his abdomen using your thumb and fingers while you run your lips and tongue up and down his entire shaft and testicles. Gently hum or moan to create heavenly vibrations against his most sensitive hot spots. A rather daring variation of this technique I have just learned during my research is to loosely wrap his member and testicles in plastic wrap before putting your lips over it and humming. The plastic wrap adds both heat and intensity to the experience.

8. Consider employing the hard palate on the roof of your mouth to provide additional stimulation to your oral presentation. Simply tip his glans up and forward before sliding it seductively across those rippled ridges. You can also add a different yet equally pleasurable sensation by rubbing the head of his penis against the inside of your cheek.

9. After kissing, nibbling and sucking only the tip for a while, suddenly give his penis one full stroke to the base of his shaft. Follow by teasing just the head again. Follow with three full strokes to the base before once again pleasuring only the head. Increase to five strokes before returning to the head. Continue to increase the strokes by two until he is finished. Another variation would be to start counting your full strokes down from five. Holding the base of his shaft with your hand, take him in your mouth and suck him up and down five times in a steady rhythm. Pause to swirl, nibble and suck the head only while stroking his shaft with your hand. Follow with four strokes using your mouth, then three, the two, and then one ending with a long, slow kiss to the head. Then begin the process again but in reverse. Begin by slowly traveling down his shaft until you are once again up to the original five.

10. While providing oral pleasure to his penis, remember to lick, suck, lap and nibble all of him – the slit, head, shaft, scrotum and perineum. Give his delectable organ full coverage and although your mouth cannot envelop all of him the entire time, be sure to use your fingers and hands as well. Try sucking him while using your hands to pull in the opposite direction or place a finger or two into your mouth to tickle and tease his penis while sucking him or create an “O” with your thumb and index finger and wrap it around his rod in front of your lips before moving both fingers and mouth up and down in tandem. When you use both your mouth and hands simultaneously to stimulate his penis, you will no doubt increase his pleasure tenfold.

Whatever techniques you choose to add to your sexual repertoire, remember that you are on a sexual expedition to unveil or perhaps rediscover what sensitivities and hot spots are uniquely his. So rather than bringing your man to orgasm quickly, take your time and explore the erotic terrain of his penis. Bring him to the edge and back again to prolong the experience for him and to increase the potential for a more intense orgasm. Tease, play and experiment for all of these techniques are meant for the womans enjoyment too. What oral techniques would you add to the list?




Master Bait, Master Bait, Master Bait and Tackle!

Did you know May has been designated as International Masturbation Month?! In celebration of solo sex – the most commonly practiced sexual act around the world – here are the top ten reasons I believe every man and women, regardless of age or relationship status, should make self-pleasuring a life-long activity.

1. Masturbation is the single most important thing we can do to increase sexual capability and competency. When we engage in solo sex, we learn how to respond to sexual stimuli. It enables us to learn how to tap into a deep level of erotic arousal and is one of the most beneficial ways to work through any inhibitions, guilt and fears we may have about completely surrendering to our sexual desires. Self-pleasuring teaches us how to have an orgasm. We can also learn how to reach climax more frequently and efficiently and then share that knowledge with our lover. Solo sex is also a delightful hands-on (pun intended) way to shift ourselves away from the reality of daily life into an erotic reality.

2. Masturbation can provide us with the most earth-shattering orgasms. Studies have shown that in masturbation, we have the strongest orgasms. As there are no distractions from our partner, we can easily stay focused on what arouses us and give ourselves the most pleasurable stimulation.

3. Masturbation adds another dimension to our sexual experience.  Essentially, there are two kinds of sexual experiences; solo sex or partnered (social) sex. Both are gratifying and neither one is better than the other. But they are different with each having their advantages and disadvantages. With solo sex, for example, we can focus solely on your own pleasure and desires without needing to think about our partner’s wants and needs. However, with partnered sex, we have opportunity to connect intimately with our lover and share in their sexual pleasure and responses. And that will no doubt heighten our own experience of the erotic encounter.

4. Masturbation can add a spicy alternative to sexual play with our partner.  Mutual masturbation with our lover is a very erotic encounter. There is something quite intimate that is shared in that experience that is much more profound than what is shared in sexual intercourse. We are permitting our partner to witness our most private sex life; the one that we usually keep out of view and hidden. Mutual masturbation is also a steamy solution during those times when we cannot engage in penetrative sex such as after the birth of a child.

5. Masturbation is practical and convenient solution for relieving sexual tension. It may not always be convenient, practical or even possible to indulge in sex with our partners. They may be away, tired or otherwise unavailable yet our very natural sexual urges and desires still need to be sated. Fortunately, masturbation offers us a practical and convenient way to release that sexual tension and since it doesn’t require our partner, there is no need for negotiation or delay.

6. Masturbation involves no relational risks. There is no concern for hurt feelings of rejection or guilt from failure to effectively please our partner. With masturbation, we have none of the complications of a relationship that can turn a sexual encounter into a negative and unrewarding experience. There is also no performance anxiety with solo sex that can sometimes be experienced with partnered sex. There is no need to fake an orgasm, no need to concern ourselves with our competency or even how we look. With masturbation, there is no fear or worry over whether we can get aroused, stay aroused or release at the right time.

7. Masturbation is an excellent stress reliever.  Self-pleasuring can be as soothing as it is sensual.  Everyday life can be stressful, causing an accumulation of anxieties and concerns. When we choose to leave behind these daily realities in favour of a more erotic one; something alters. The daily stresses and worries are soon replaced with erotic thoughts and fantasies putting us into a much different and more pleasant frame of mind. Many individuals; especially women like me find that masturbating just before bed helps provide the relaxation required to fall asleep.

8. Masturbation maintains our sexual health. Like a vehicle that needs regular tune ups to run optimally; so too does our sexuality. Solo sex is maintance sex. Research has proven that regular sexual play is necessary to keep our sexual system functioning properly; especially as we age.

9. Masturbation makes us feel more sensuous. One of the quickest, surest and most satisfying ways to invoke greater sensuality within ourselves is to titillate and tease our body and mind with a little self-pleasuring.  When we think about masturbating, we are thinking about sex and when we think about sex we feel sexy and sensual. Solo sex allows us to discover and appreciate our sexual self. When we frequently immerse ourselves in the act of self-pleasuring; we feel sexier, more sensuous and more self-confident as a result.

10. Masturbation is one of the most pleasurable experiences we can give ourselves. We now know that there is no harm in solo sex. In fact, self-pleasuring is helpful to both our physical and psychological well-being. We would all be happier and healthier if we made masturbation a habit throughout our lifespan. I intend on doing just that…will you?







*EXTRA! Since today is Memorial Day we all should have more time to watch a couple of 15 minute TED Talks…




Sexual Reflexology


When most of us hear the word “reflexology” we think of a nice, relaxing, foot massage, not a genital massage. Sure, we all know that our sexual organs are extremely sensitive and can trigger incredible sensations, but most people don’t realize that the genitals contain some of the most powerful reflex points in the human body.

Genital reflexology is a practice of activating the sexual reflex points during lovemaking, transforming sex into an ecstatic acupressure experience. Maybe you won’t be moaning  “I love it when you pleasure my kidney!” but you will feel the positive emotions.

Reflexology is an alternative medicine technique which uses pressure-point massage to restore the flow of energy throughout the entire body. It is based on the premise that there are zones or reflexes on different body parts that relate to every gland, organ and part of our body.  It is believed that the ends of the body are a rich source of acupressure and reflex points which is why reflexology is often applied to the feet, hands, ears or face. However, Taoist sexologists assert that the most intense and powerful reflex points are actually the sex organs themselves.

The healing concepts and practices that make up sacred Taoist sexuality can help you achieve everlasting health, wellness, and spiritualization of the body, not to mention intense pleasure.

Do Not Be Intimidated!

According to these sexologists, the reflexology zones located in the vagina are the same as those found on the penis, except in reverse order. Therefore, when a lover’s penis fits snugly into his partner’s vagina during sexual intercourse these reflex zones line up to produce a powerful connection between both bodies and when the lovemaking is slow and purposeful, it can also aid in healing emotional and physical ailments.


Zones of the Vagina

Kidney – This zone covers the entrance of the vaginal canal and G-spot area. When it is unwell, a woman can experience fear, guilt, shame and frigidity. When this zone is healthy, she can experience greater calm, faith and peacefulness.  During intercourse, this area can be stimulated best with shallow thrusting.

Liver/Gall Bladder – This area is located further up from the G-spot area. When this zone is out of balance, it can generate feelings of anger, frustration, irritability, resentment and depression.  It is this area that is involved in headaches. When healthy, it creates feelings of kindness, generosity, optimism and self-assurance.  By wrapping her legs around her partner’s thighs while in the missionary sex position, the liver zone can be sufficiently stimulated.

Spleen/Pancreas – This zone is located further up from the liver/gall bladder area in the vaginal canal. When this zone is unwell it generates feelings of pensiveness, stress, worry and anxiety. When it is in balance, there is a feeling of openness, centeredness and being grounded.  This zone can be easily accessed while in the missionary sex position. She reclines on her back with her legs locked around her lover’s midsection and her arms wrapped around his back or shoulders. He is on his hands and knees and only penetrates her halfway while she rotates her hips first in one direction and then the other.

Lung – This zone is further up and is where the anterior (A-spot) and posterior arches are located. This is often the most untouched area of a women’s sexual anatomy as it is the area around the cervix rather than the cervix itself. When this area is out of balance it can generate feelings of grief, sadness, self-criticism and low self-esteem.  When it is healthy, feelings of confidence, self-assuredness and a respect for one’s personal boundaries are the result.  During intercourse, any position that allows for deep penetration such as woman on top or rear entry position is ideal for stimulating this area.

Heart – The location of this zone is the cervix itself. When there is an imbalance, there can be feelings of impatience, anxiety, overstimulation, impulsiveness and apathy. When balanced,  there is joy, enthusiasm, greater self-awareness, passion and a profound respect for self and others. During intercourse, the best way to stimulate this zone is with slow, deep penetration.  Gently massaging the cervix can be a profoundly healing experience as it can open a woman’s heart so she is better able to give and receive love. It is said that once this zone is awakened and in balance, a woman can experience a fully body orgasm or “heart-gasm” with her trusted partner.

Now of course, sexual intercourse is not the only way in which these zones can be activated and healed by a loving partner.  Slow, soft massage with a finger or two can also be very effective. However, since the whole body becomes revitalized when all the surfaces of her vagina are stimulated, her lover should make a point to massage all areas so as not to create an imbalance.


Whether she prefers her zones to be stimulated during intercourse, with her lover’s hands or mouth or even simply on her own, a woman should take time to explore and experiment with new ways to stimulate those areas that may not get as much attention.  And with your newfound knowledge of vagina reflexology, she is now provided with a wonderful opportunity to both improve her health and enhance her sexual pleasure. Don’t be shy! Try it and let me know how it goes!




Oral….Sex? or Foreplay?

I love that fine distinction between the various wonderful sexual acts, and the delicious anticipation gestures of foreplay.

Setting the mood, getting one’s self and partner ready in anticipation for more. And the emotional and sexual buildup that leads to more and more and more.

Different kinds of stimulation/gratification/sexual contact are all special, even more so after a cleverly imagined and executed foreplay, that important mix is so sensual and lively!


Using your mouth to stimulate your partner’s genitals is considered one of the most intimate acts between lovers.  Women and men find it incredibly pleasurable – both as givers and receivers.  It will often bring a partner to orgasm when other methods cannot.  Therefore, contrary to the opinions of many sexperts and one former US president, oral pleasuring is indeed sex and not merely a method of foreplay.

Foreplay, by definition, consists of those intimate emotional and physical interactions between two (or more) lovers meant to generate sexual desire and arousal. Its entire purpose is to entice and excite one another sexually BEFORE the genitals are even touched.

Since foreplay is about building sexual interest and tension but without genital contact, it can begin the moment we open our eyes in the morning and last the entire day. Depending on our partner’s erotic preferences, foreplay can include any of the following stimulations.

Visual Cues – sending sexy photos, a striptease performance, the wearing of sexually suggestive clothing or creating an intimate, romantic or sensually appealing atmosphere are all ways we can visually arouse our lover.

Verbal Cues – compliments, subtle innuendo, flirting, teasing and intimate conversations either in person or by phone are all forms of verbal foreplay.

Behavioral Cues – a seductive smile or wink, suggestive postures, gestures and movements, licking or biting of one’s lips, eye gazing and entering inside a lover’s personal space can convey sexual intent and raise a lover’s libido.

Physical Cues – the touching, kissing, licking or nibbling of non-genital erogenous zones as well as hugging, cuddling or the removal of a lover’s clothing are all physical ways that we can engage in foreplay.


Ultimately, the point of foreplay is to provoke sexual arousal in our partner. Oral sex, however, is like intercourse or anal sex. It is a means in which to quench our desire. If foreplay is the appetizer then sex – including oral sex – is the main course. And while pleasuring our partner’s genitals orally may be a sexual act in and of itself, it can also be a transitional activity. Like when we change sex positions during lovemaking.  The key to remember is that however we choose to stimulate our partner’s genitals –   manually, orally or with our own genitals – it is always more successful and satisfying when foreplay is first achieved.

So perhaps if we stopped thinking of oral sex as just one of a myriad methods of foreplay and instead recognized it as the intimate sexual act that it is, we would not only likely find it more enjoyable, we may even be more inclined to acquire the patience, precision and skill required to do it well. Study the anatomy and the erogenous zones and talk to your lover about preferences and fantasies. These suggestions are guaranteed to invigorate your sex life! Relax and enjoy practicing! Practice makes perfect!




I Happen To Be A Huge Fan Of Cuddling

Since the slightest touch creates a mild electrical circuit between two people, major cuddling enhances the whole shared electrical field around the couple. Nerves throughout the two bodies fall into sync for both people. We were created to do that to keep couples together. It’s usually called bonding. An altered state triggered by great chemicals (natural opiates in the brain) and oxytocin, the so-called “love drug.” That delightful “love hormone”, oxytocin also contributes to feelings of calm and contentment as well as sexual arousal.  It doesn’t matter if sex happens or not….it’s an awesome feeling of being so close!  Sex doesn’t have to occur for couples to benefit from cuddling. Cuddling can, however, be a wonderful way to transition into intercourse! Win win!

More than a quaint gesture of physical affection, cuddling is an intimate way to communicate.  It can comfort and soothe after a stressful day. It can make us feel warm and protected. It makes us feel closer, more connected to our lover which can strengthen our relationship. It can also trigger sexual desire. Without one word being spoken, cuddling can let our partner know that…

We love them.

We miss them.

We need them.

We desire them.

We want to feel them.

We want to smell them.

We want to crawl inside them.

With just the use of physical touch, cuddling becomes a pleasurable discovery exchange between lovers. When we snuggle, our awareness shifts to both, our partner’s body as well as our own. We feel sexier, more sensual and more desired as a result. And with almost twice as many nerve endings in their skin as men, it is little wonder that women love cuddling so much.  And even though cozying up to her partner can certainly be a satisfying stand-alone activity, it can also arouse her sexually.


One of the advantages of using cuddling as a foreplay technique is that it can begin while you are out in public. Partners can cozy up to one another at a restaurant, a friendly gathering, while stargazing or when they are out at the movie theater.

Even if you are cuddling in the privacy of your own home, timing and a bit of finesse are still required.  Especially if you have children! Be sure to choose a location where you can lay down together comfortably such as the sofa or a bed. Be mindful of temperature as well. You do not want it to be too hot or cold.

The brush of skin against skin is intoxicating and aids in building sexual tension. So take your time. Begin by using your hands to gently rub your partner’s shoulders, back, arms, waist or thighs. Tickle them softly.  Play with their hair. Caress their ears.  Shower them with little kisses as you touch them. Eventually, when things begin to heat up and clothing starts to come off, move on to one of the four following cuddling positions. The one you choose will depend on your sexual intentions.


Best Positions for Sexual Cuddling (IMOHO)


1. Him Spooning from Behind – This side by side position is without a doubt, the most common of all cuddling positions. This is when both partners are snuggled into one another, front to back, while on their sides.  In this position, he can easily enter her while continuing to kiss or rub her neck, back, arms or legs. He can also caress her breasts and stroke her clitoris without difficulty or she can simply do it herself.

For another delectable variation, she can raise her top leg so that he can slide his thigh between both of hers. Propping his one foot on the bed or sofa for leverage, he then half kneels with the other leg. In this position both partners are still nestled together but now there is the option for deep penetration and slow thrusting too. It’s a win-win.

2. Her Spooning from Behind This is similar position as above except with her front to his back. In this position, she can easily delight in his body and use her free hand to fondle and stroke his member.

3. Face to Face Also known as the inverted spoon, this cuddling position is when partners lay on their sides, facing one another.  In addition to touch, cuddling in this way makes it easy to include kissing and eye-gazing then after glow or pillow talk.

As they move onto intercourse, she would spread her legs slightly to allow him to penetrate her. She then closes her legs so that the part of his shaft that remains outside her vagina will press against her clitoris for further stimulation.  Since straight thrusting is often more difficult in this cuddling position, couples can instead use different techniques such as grinding or circular movements.

4. The Half-Spoon  This cuddling position is accomplished when one partner lies on their back while the other lies on their side facing them. The partner lying on their side will often rest their head on the other’s shoulder, chest or belly and entwine their legs.  In this position, the partner on their side can eventually move onto manual or oral genital stimulation of their lover. The half-spoon cuddling position is also ideal for manual masturbation.


Remember that cuddling is an activity that should never be rushed; like deep, passionate kisses. A good sexual snuggle offers you a chance to bond and experience sensual pleasure with your lover. So savor each cuddling encounter by taking things ever so s-l-o-w-l-y.


Are you a cuddler?




Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This

He backed away to the outer door and opened it with some noise

My “Is that you honey?” sounded like my intoxicated voice

As he entered my room, the pleasant scent of my juices greet him

I smiled at him spread eagle while my toy rested freely

He swiftly glided over to my king size bed

He buried his face between my thighs, ready to be fed

My drenched pussy still swollen from my pluck

Clueless that he watched my early morning fuck


Licking petals and pearl and gently suckling the area

My moans increase sharply; his aim to please grew clearer

Pushing my legs up so my thighs pressed against my breasts

Watching me exposed and appetizing, he devoured my love nest

Sinking one finger deep into my dripping honeypot

His lips and tongue feast on my wet petals like a glut

Hips move in an erotic dance under his juicy mouth

Tonguing, licking, sucking and fingering in and out


Sharp jerks and a sudden scream expel my second peak

He quickly shed his trousers and slid his cock in deep

I began to buck and grind as he ploughed in rough fashion

Pounding his jealous cock into my thirsty passion

Building me up to come again was his wicked plan

He fucked me continuously after every multiple orgasm

In spasms, shakes, jerks and flexing in one erotic movement

Jabbing his shaft deeply as I explode and violently spent


Immediately he flipped me to the position called doggie

Pulling me to the edge of the bed as he stood on the floor firmly

He buried his face in my apex and tasted himself in my juicy mixture

My ass raised high in the air feels his kneading gesture

Stepping on the foot stool, his cock entered my swollen pussy

Rear-ending my dripping honey cove causes me to exhale loudly

One hand grips my hip to help keep me steady

As his other hand spanked my tight ass firmly


Swaying on my knees as he plunged hard and deeply

The view from behind was affecting him successfully

He fists my hair and pulled my head up as the invasion continued

I was howling and grunting with passion from his rough moves

Soon I began to tense and then yell that I’m coming

He plunged his cock deeply as I deliver intense contractions while humming

I collapse on to the bed, sliding off of his slick pole

He watched me spasm and jerk weakly; I felt his hands touch and hold


I reached up to grip his straining timber and slowly sat up

Smoothly my head lowered to envelope his mushroom head and suck

Tasting our juices caused my eyes to widen with glee

Caressing his balls as I sucked up and down was so fun

Moving my hand in a pump action until he was almost undone 

Then all the way down I go to push him behind my throat

He grabbed the back of my head compelling me to hold that note

No gagging or resisting while precum and saliva seep


Gently I surfaced and quickly returned again, so deep

My oral talent continued until he could no longer contain

I felt his pulsing shaft getting ready to shoot without refrain

Opening my eyes wide when the first shot hit my face

My face, neck and breasts turn into a creamy mound

I pumped and squeeze his cock until every last spurt

Rubbing his shaft on my creamy nipples, breasts and face for all Im worth

Whispering in my ear that he enjoyed the vibrator show

I looked surprised because I thought he didn’t know 





I Love My Toys!

Early in the morning I awake

So aroused; a decision I must make

His  job has summoned him earlier so I decide to masturbate

My very wet pussy will soon enjoy something great

Sliding my hands up my waist to find my nipples fully erect

Rolling them between my fingers as if to inspect

My mind races with images of which toy I will choose

My new life-size vibrator is the one I will use


On the bed among pillows, I make myself comfortable

Spreading my legs wide open, as they begin to tremble

Slowly sliding my pleasure toy over the top of my clit

I already love this device for its excellent fit

My pussy is nice and wet so I slide it slowly inside

Moving it in and out with such skill, taking much pride

Feeling my pussy muscles contract around my device

It feels so good, I may just pleasure myself twice


Not yet turning on the power for my toy to run

Acquiring the sensations from this in and out fun

Wisely using the pillows to hold my tool in its place

Then straddling my pleasure device, squatting with haste

My hot pussy rides down my toy all the way in

Powering it on so that it starts to vibrate as well as spin

My moans and tightly closed eyes did not see his hidden grin

Up, down I go, around and round I rotate my hips

I am getting ready to come, pussy nectar begins to drip


Feeling so good that I am are sure to do this again

To make my thirsty honey pot pour liquid like rain

I come uncontrollably hard with pure vibrating ecstasy

Soon ready for a second round of self-pleasuring freely

He was stroking his hard cock by the door where I could not see

He enjoyed this early morning entertainment jealously

Watching me prepare for round two with full restrain

Wanting to join in the show as blood fills his cock’s veins…

…to be continued






This Weeks Home Work…

The clitoris has only one function. One singular, delicious purpose. To provide a woman with pleasure.  This marvel of human anatomy may look tiny but it actually extends about two centimeters inside a woman’s body.  And although made with the same tissue as a penis, it is made with twice the amount – about 8,000 – sensory nerve fibers.

Located at the top of the vulva or pussy, just above the urethra (pee hole), is the most sensitive part of the clitoris – the glans. Despite being highly responsive to various forms of stimulation, it can still be quite temperamental.  Yet the man who takes the time to learn this little button of female joy will soon discover how to truly arouse her and send her spiraling toward orgasmic bliss!


Tick Tock – The Clitoral Clock

For this sensual expedition, you will need the following:

A private place containing a bed, chaise or upholstered chair

Soft music and lighting, scented candles or incense to help set the mood (optional)

A couple of pillows and a towel

At least 20 minutes of uninterrupted adult play time

A water-based lubricant (or if you prefer, coconut oil is always a good, safe choice)


The Technique

Once she is seduced properly, and her clothing is removed, she should be placed in a position where both of you will be comfortable for the duration of this exercise. I suggest she is laying on her back with her head on a small pillow and a fairly thick pillow under her lower back and bottom with a towel on it to raise her hips up. It should be a position where she can easily open her legs to you and you can view and caress her velvety mound without effort. This is a perfect time to adore her pussy and tell her how beautiful she is and how much you desire her.  Make sure your nails are filed or cut short and hands are clean, soft and warm.

Begin by slowly kissing and stroking her lower belly, hips and inner thighs. When you feel your partner become relaxed, add ample lubricant to both your fingers and her vulva, paying particular attention to the clitoral area. Spend a few minutes softly petting and rubbing your partner’s clitoris and vagina. Be sure to ask her if what you are doing feels good to her.

Keep in mind that not all women find direct stimulation of the visible clitoris glans pleasurable, so it is best to apply your touch to the clitoral hood – that fold of skin that protects and covers the delicate bud underneath. Start from the outer area where her thighs meet her vulva and massage, stroke, and kiss working your way inward.

Imagining that her clitoris is a clock – with twelve o’clock at the top nearest her belly – and using one or two well-lubricated fingers, begin to circle her clitoris in a clockwise direction.

Once you have slowly repeated this circular motion several times, begin asking your partner to comment as you stimulate each of the twelve number or clock positions. Ask her to describe the intensity of sensations for each “time” position – one o’clock, two o’clock, three o’clock, etc. – using a scale of one to five. For example, one means little sensation or uncomfortable, two means slightly pleasurable, three means pleasurable, four means very pleasurable with five reserved for the most pleasurable sensations; the one that is likely to trigger an orgasm if further stimulation occurs. She can either speak her descriptions or signal you by her breathing, writhing, and moans. What ever she is most comfortable with. Watch her face, her hands and her toes. Be focused on her and in tune with her body.

Now according to some sex experts, the upper left quadrant of the clitoris is the most sensitive spot. However, I have found that a different clock position is far more satisfying for me personally. It may be the same for your partner too. So do not rely solely on what the sexperts have to say. This is another example of why communication is so important. Of course with twelve potential hotspots and four possible quadrants for pleasure available, it is easy to understand why this exercise is so beneficial. It may also explain why most women automatically use a circling motion when stimulating their clitoris during solo sex.

Continue the slow circular clockwise motion using different strokes and pressure as you continue getting her reaction, be it moans, sighs, wiggles or words. Remember that her little bud is highly sensitive so stimulation should be done with tenderness in the beginning. Once she becomes aroused, she may want you to apply stronger, more intense pressure.

Try moving your fingers in tighter and tighter circles around her clitoris leaning the palm of your hand on her vaginal area. Or consider alternating between manual and oral stimulation. Use your tongue to gently flick and swirl in a clockwise motion. No teeth! Use your mouth to kiss and nibble in the same circular motion while you slide your fingers inside her vagina and rub her G-spot. Make sure she continues to communicate exactly how everything feels and which kind of stimulation she likes best.

Continue your manual and oral play until she achieves orgasm. This can take anywhere from five to thirty minutes, or more depending on the woman. It is likely that as she becomes increasingly aroused, her clitoris will become engorged, erect and more visible. For many women, her little joy button will actually rise up to where it may look like its disappearing back into the folds of skin above and around it just prior to orgasm.

If you are especially observant to these changes, you can then prolong her pleasure and increase the intensity of her orgasm simply by changing how and where along the “clock” you stimulate her clitoris. This is edging.

As an added bonus to this sensual expedition around her luscious little bud, you will now have a mental map to her most pleasurable hotspots which you can access with ease and certainty in the future. Take mental notes and you will know her individual way to orgasmic bliss every time! Don’t forget the after care and enjoy your home work!